[Discussion] I'm depressed and feel suicidal. I don't want to die and I want to succeed, but I feel like there no hope for me.

I know there is TONS of people here, or anywhere really who are depressed and feeling suicidal. It's good to know that I am not alone, but I don't want to be depressed or suicidal. I'm 22 years old and feel like I'm wasting my life and one of the reasons is because I don't like myself. Matter of fact, I hate who I am right now. I feel like I'm not enough in anything so I try to better myself but come up short. I have so much to think about right now. My dad has a chronic illness and he might die, right now we are struggling with money, I struggle with addiction, I'm alone, and hate who I see in the mirror. I think the only thing that keeps me with any self-esteem is my past results with people telling me how attractive and good-looking I am which made me into a validation junkie. But I know my end goal of dream life that I want? I just don't know how he hell to get there. This is the part where it depressed me because I don't know how to get to where I want to go or if I am good enough to live that life. Help? My mind and anxiety is driving me crazy right now. I feel like I need to control everything and it sucks when I can't.

I just want to be happy with myself and my life, but more with myself.

Submitted May 01, 2017 at 12:59PM by MyMacBookz http://ift.tt/2pyVzR9