I didn't kiss a girl until I was 18 and in my first year of university.
Fast forward 14 or so years, and I've been told by women that they're "lucky to be talking to me" in a crowded bar of other guys, and that I've got the most interesting job out of many that they've talked to. I've had women ask me out on multiple occasions.
I've been to 43 countries, started a business, started a TEDx event from scratch, participated in a sex show in Amsterdam, ran a marathon, lived in Canada and the UK, quit my job, created an app and 2 podcasts, cycled across Canada, and am writing this from a cafe in Krakow 16 months into a round-the-world trip. There's a hot Australian girl in the internet cafe upstairs that I met yesterday afternoon and slept with last night waiting for me.
I don't prescribe to "motivation", PUA, or most conventional wisdom for improving your life for a simple reason -- any behaviour change, if not rooted in evidence and results, can easily go away. These approaches work for the short term, but I haven't had any long-term results with them. There's no foundation. It's motivation porn.
You can try to "become motivated", or you can do things that give you natural confidence in your ability to execute things. Slow, steady progress in doing things, then using the confidence built to do more things. A virtuous cycle.
So, how the hell did I start? Here's what's worked for me as a habit over the last 8 years -- I do a weekly review. It's worked for others, and I hope some of you find it useful too.
The basic question I ask myself (and write down the answer to), is this - how's life going, and how can I make it a tiny bit better next week?
Over the short term (a few weeks or months), you'll hardly notice a difference. Over the LOOOOONG term (years), the results are shocking. I've kept up this habit for the last 8 years because my life wouldn't be the same without it.
Hopefully, it can help some of you as well.
Here are some thoughts/tips on what I've found works:
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Create a recurring Google Calendar event (with an email notification) to do your weekly review. Don't rely on a notification or phone alarm, since these are easy to dismiss. An email sits in your inbox until it gets sorted. It gives you flexibility. Most of the time my Weekly Review doesn't happen on the day it's scheduled for. That's ok.
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Rather than a written journal, I use a digital system (PBWorks.com, but you can use Evernote/Google docs etc). The digital nature of it means it can't get lost if I move and I can do it on my phone or while travelling if I don't have my computer with me.
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Keep it simple. The key is to build the habit (reviewing your life) rather than overcomplicating it with tracking specific goals (eg: "how many miles did I run this week?").
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Noticing the great things about your life is a real skill. Always try to notice at least one thing a week (even if it's just "hey, I didn't have sugar in my coffee on Thursday"). If you can't think of a way that you won the week in the past week, do one then (eg: text a friend asking about their life). Always find a way in which you've already won the week, and/or find a way to win the week. Little progress repeated often has MASSIVE results.
Good luck.
Submitted November 02, 2017 at 06:10PM by rmhildebrandt http://ift.tt/2zriUKk
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